


Measure of Comfort

by orphan_account



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Episode Tag, Episode: s02e20 The Fall's Gonna Kill You, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-05-19
Updated: 2001-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-15 18:58:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14796131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Toby goes to see CJ.  Sequel toA Sence of Normalcy





	Measure of Comfort

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

Disclaimers: The West Wing and it's characters are the  
property of Aaron Sorkin, Warner Brothers and NBC. No  
copyright infringement is intended. No profit is being  
made from this. 

Rating: G 

Summary: Toby goes to see CJ after the events of "The  
Fall's Gonna Kill You." 

Spoilers: 17 People, Bad Moon Rising, The Fall's Gonna  
Kill You. 

Author's Notes: This is set in the same universe as "A  
Sense of Normality" my post ep to "17 People". 

Mesure of Comfort

He twisted the small rubber ball around in his hand  
as he waited for her to return. Truthfully, he didn't  
know if she would come, but he had to make the offer  
nonetheless. It was the same offer he had made to Josh  
a couple of nights earlier, and the same offer he  
would make to Sam tomorrow night, that he would be in  
his office when they were finished. It was the least  
he could do. He wished he could do more for CJ. She  
had realized he was lying, just as he suspected she  
would. He had hated lying to her, but it wasn't his  
place to tell her. He waited for close to an hour, and  
then realized she wasn't coming. He suspected she had  
already left, and his suspicions were confirmed when  
her office was dark and empty. He knew then that she  
wanted to be alone. He honored her wishes and went to  
his own apartment. 

The next morning when he got to work, he learned that  
she was in the White House Counsel's office. He had  
already had that experience himself. It was not an  
experience that he wanted to repeat. The man was  
almost as insufferable as Toby himself. He didn't envy  
CJ's task that morning. 

He didn't see her at all the entire day. He wondered  
if she was trying to avoid him. More than anything he  
wanted to be able to go talk to her. Maybe once he was  
finished with Sam he would be able to. 

Sam's shock was not surprising at all. It took quite  
a while for Toby to be finished with him. Finally, he  
was able to leave. He had not spoken with CJ since she  
found out, and he desperately wanted to know how she  
was taking it. 

When he got there, her apartment was completely dark.  
It was eerily reminiscent of the night he had come to  
her, the night he had found out. He walked into her  
bedroom and found her in the bed. 

Walking to the bed, he quietly sat down next to her.  
"Toby..." She mumbled. 

"Yeah, I'm right here." 

"MS." The initials she spoke were barely audible, but  
they spoke volumes. 

"I know." 

"You found out that night I came back from  
California." 

"Yeah." 

"How...how did you feel?" 

"There were so many emotions. I don't believe I could  
narrow it down to just one." 

"Okay." 

He reached over to stroke her hair. She didn't move  
away from his touch at all. He wanted to be able to  
tell her everything would be fine. However, he knew  
the words would ring as hollow to her as they did to  
him. 

"I've been lying almost daily for years." She said  
quietly. 

"You didn't know." 

"If you say so." 

"CJ, there's no way you could have known or  
suspected." 

"Really?" 

"Yes." He said although he caught something in her  
voice. 

"Even if in Manhattan, Kansas, I saw her give him an  
injection." She regretted the words almost  
immediately. "I'm sorry I shouldn't be dragging you  
into this." 

He squeezed her hand. "You couldn't have known." 

"I should have asked!" 

"CJ, you did what you thought was best at the time.  
Don't beat yourself up over it." 

"I should have..." 

He sighed, she was almost as stubborn as him. "CJ,  
what did you think it was?" 

"I don't know. Maybe allergies?" 

"There's nothing wrong with allergies." 

"I know. I had to take shots daily from April to  
October when I was a child." 

"Logical conclusion then." 

"Yeah, but..." 

"CJ, leave it alone. You aren't at fault here." 

"I should have..." 

"None of us had any way of knowing he had a  
debilitating disease." 

"Yeah." 

"We did not knowingly participate in a cover up." 

"That's not going to matter." She snapped. 

He knew she was probably right about that and was  
silent for a moment. 

"Abbey didn't know they were going to tell me last  
night. She wanted to be there when they did." 

"I think she almost things of you as a daughter, or a  
little sister." 

"Yeah." She moved to lay down. "I'm going to try to  
sleep." 

"Care if I stay?" 

"Not at all." She said, feeling incredulous that he  
could think otherwise. 

"Okay." He changed and laid down with her. He reached  
out to hold her, hoping that the action would give her  
some measure of comfort. 

The end. 

  


End file.
